I Choose Recovery
- Lex
- Aug 16, 2017
- 5 min read
Recovery is a choice. And it is not a one time only choice. It's a choice every damn day. That's why I think it is important to share how I choose recovery every day, and what has really helped me along the way. If you have any tips or recommendations, please share in the comments! I'd love to hear and add some to my own toolbox!
Books
I LOVE to read. And reading books about eating disorders has been vital for my recovery for many reasons. Reading is a form of self care for me, and reading about eating disorders makes me understand mine more and feel so much less alone and/or crazy. Below is a list of books that have helped me through my recovery. (Click on the title for a link to buy on amazon!)
This book was LIFE CHANGING at the beginning of my recovery. It really helped me give my eating disorder a name and an identity separate than my own "true" self. It helped me to recognize the eating disorder voice in my head, tell it it was wrong, and eventually defy it. What I also LOVED about this book as that the chapters are REALLY short, which is super helpful because when you are starving yourself, your attention span is pretty small.
This is a FANTASTIC book written by a father about his daughter's struggle with anorexia. It includes anecdotes and letters that he wrote his daughter while in treatment. For any one who feels their parents are absent, dysfunctional, unsupportive, or just don't understand, it is a great way to "re-parent" yourself. I loved this book.
This book gave me a first realistic hope that I could be fully recovered one day. There are so many little stories and visuals that have helped me process what recovery looks like and accept that every day won't be perfect and every day will be hard, but it IS possible. If you are struggling to find hope, I really recommend this book.
This book is not eating disorder specific, but has been one of the most helpful tools to my recovery. This book is about addiction (specifically drug and alcohol) but looks at all addiction in the same way, that it is the root of human suffering. It takes a buddhist approach to recovery which really changed the way I looked at things and includes a lot of writing activities and meditations. HIGHLY recommend.
Once I was a stable weight for quite a few months and behaviors reduced dramatically, I began reading this book. I would not advise reading it until you and your dietician have worked out that you are ready too. I'm not going to lie, I haven't finished reading it. It's not the most interesting book out there. BUT it's a very important read and has taught me SOOOOO much about my body and food and led me to trust my body so much more than I did with hunger and fullness cues. And one day I will finish it!!
Meetings
I attend 2 different meetings right now, each one once a week. Each organization has meetings across the US. (Click on the name for a link to meeting websites)
ACA- This meeting is for adult children of alcoholics and dysfunctional families. A LOT of addiction (alcohol, drugs, food, work) stems from a childhood with dysfunction, and these meetings will open up exactly how your childhood has affected you and what traits you have today because of it. It is also SO helpful because you feel so much less alone/crazy. The focus is really on reparenting yourself and finding your inner child, which I think is a crucial aspect of eating disorder recovery.
This meeting is based on the book from above. Although it is mostly drug/alcohol addictions, I have been to several meetings and no one has ever made me feel like I didn't belong because of my ED. Also, they view all addiction as the same. These meetings have a Buddhist approach and have a meditation and discussion component.
Yoga
I started yoga while I was in my treatment center and it has been absolutely essential to my recovery. As an exercise binger, it gave me a healthy way to exercise that helps me tune into my body and really learn to listen to my body. It also makes me feel strong and sometimes amazes me what my body can do. It has taught me to use my breath when I am anxious. Of course you can do yoga in any studio you find, just be careful that it is a studio that is focused on true yoga and not promoting yoga for weight loss or anything crazy like that. If you're like me, and your strapped for cash or time and can't make a yoga studio work, don't fret! There are some AMAZING youtube channels out there. Here are a few of my favorites. (Click on the name to link to their channel)
Yoga with Adrienne- She is SUPER popular and has like a million videos for every thing you can imagine. Her Yoga for Headaches video changed my life when it comes to getting headaches. She's also super bubbly and funny which I like. My only gripe is that she talks a little to much for my liking.
Yoga with Kassandra- She is my favorite beyond favorite on youtube!! She has so many awesome videos at different levels and focusing on different things. She also has videos at varying lengths. She talks the perfect amount for me and gives super awesome instruction! The only thing I don't do of hers is yin yoga, because hers is just a little to slow for me.
Flow with Adee- Once a week (at least) I like to do a restorative yoga because it feels amazing and is so relaxing, and Adee is my go to! Her slow flows are amazing and stretch every part of me and make me feel brand new. Secret: I've even got my husband to try a couple of her videos with me for his shoulder pain and he loves her too!
Self-Care
You CANNOT forget about self care. Schedule just a little bit of time for yourself each day to do something just for you. IT IS NOT SELFISH TO DO THIS. It makes you a better friend, sibling, child, partner, employee, parent, whatever you are because you are taking care of yourself.
Some things I do for self care: Read, watch a TV show my husband wouldn't watch but I like, paint my nails, knit, color, WRITE MY BLOG (lol), arts and crafts, cook, yoga, take my dogs for a walk, nap, hot cocoa, wrap up in a blankie, put on fuzzy socks, TED talks
TED talks
I've recently (like in the past week) became obsessed with TED talks. And they are only like 20 minutes so it's easy to fit into my day.
Brene Brown is a researcher who studies shame and vulnerability. Just trust me and watch.
I also really like one I watched by Caroline McHugh about being yourself. Bonus: She has an awesome Scottish accent!
Lastly, I think it's important to remember to keep up with your dietician and therapist appointments in recovery. Even during those times when you feel like you got this and can do it yourself. Remember, you have to KEEP choosing recovery.
Good luck with your recovery and keep fighting every day. You are a warrior. We all are.
Peace and love<3
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